Life is a journey, full of twists and unexpected turns. But when we submit our ways to the Lord, He “makes our paths straight.” (Proverbs 3:6) 

Have you ever considered a trial to be a gift?

After I was diagnosed with stage II breast cancer in October of 2020, I had the distinct impression of the Lord saying, as He did to Peter in Luke 22, “Satan has asked to sift you like wheat.”

Though a bit unsettling, I thought, Okay, I’ll go through this trial, cling to the Lord, gain new insights, bolster my faith, and move on. Little did I know the “sifting” would not be short-lived. After a year of treatments and a brief six month reprieve, my battle moved to a deeper level. The cancer we thought had been killed out instead spread to my bones and lymph nodes.

Three and a half years after my original diagnosis, I’m still battling, still daily being sifted like wheat. Though cancer meds and radiation have worked to slow the disease, the treatments have taken a toll on my body. My strength is sapped and my body depleted.


Can the Lord heal me? Absolutely! Will He? Only time will tell.

Part of me longs for my old healthy body and to be rid of this relentless, wasting disease. I rejoice any time I have a feel-good, pain-free day. Which, honestly, haven’t been many in recent weeks.

But another part of me sees the precious gift at the core of this trial–a more Heaven focused mindset. When I look at the sky, I think of Heaven. The beauty of creation makes me wonder what it will be like to stroll amid the perfect creation alongside our Creator. When I experience aches and pains, I wonder what it will be like to have a new body, with no pain or imperfection of any kind. Won’t that be wonderful?

When I hear conversations about things like clothing, decorating, or someone’s latest purchase, especially after my Stage IV diagnosis, I just can’t relate. The things of this world have lost their luster. Don’t get me wrong, I still slip back into earthly thinking quite often. But it’s just different somehow. Not as important.

Family. Relationships. Faith. That’s what’s important.

I find myself eager to make the best use of my time on this earth. Make each day count somehow by speaking words of encouragement to someone or sharing what the Lord is whispering to my heart. What Satan means for harm, the Lord can use for good.

Whatever the future holds, I want to live with Paul’s motto, “For me to live is Christ and to die is gain.” (Philippians 1:21)

**Have you ever experienced a trial that draws you closer to God?



Inspirational Historical Romance set during the Civil War era

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