Since September 24, I’ve been living every person’s nightmare. That was the day I learned, after only a few month following my previous year of cancer treatments, my cancer had not only resurfaced, but had progressed to Stage IV. Besides the original sight, cancer had spread to my lymph nodes and bones.
Upon hearing the news, my husband and I booked a cottage and just spent time together to grieve our news, pray, and ponder where to go from here. That venture was the best thing we could have done. It gave us time to absorb the blow and process the news.
PROCESSING HARD NEWS
Our initial numbness soon turned to shared tears, pleas for the Lord’s mercies, and refocusing. It’s difficult to describe the feeling of knowing death is knocking at your door far sooner than expected or wanted.
Acceptance of the news came far sooner than I anticipated. My only regrets were the thought of leaving my husband alone, not seeing my youngest son married, and not experiencing the joy of being a grandma. Everything else I was at peace with. The Lord had fulfilled my dream of being a published writer. And though, I longed for the opportunity to write more novels, I was content knowing the Lord had allowed me to use the gifts He’d given me for His glory.
OUR NEXT STEP
Following a number of doctor visits and tests (some of which varied from previous results), I started chemo pills and prayed the Lord would allow the treatment to work. We called upon our prayer warriors to cover us as well. Within a couple of weeks, I was noting progress (less pain, decreased mass size).
A visit to a reputable cancer center for a second opinion, assured us we were on the right track. The sobering news came when the doctor informed us I would likely need some form of chemo the rest of my life and that at some point, the present treatment would become ineffective.
But God is a God of miracles. And we are holding onto hope that He will bring complete healing. But if He chooses not to, that’s okay as well. I know where I’m going, and nothing in this world can compare. I don’t know what tomorrow will bring, but I know Who holds tomorrow.
FRESH EYES TO SEE
This experience has given my husband and me fresh eyes to see the small blessings that are often overlooked in the busyness of life. That is a gift we hope to hold onto no matter how long or short of time we have together. None of us knows how long we will live, but we can make the choice to be thankful in the hard times as well as the good ones.
This Thanksgiving, may you see God’s blessing in the sunrises and sunsets, in the presence of family and friends, and in simply waking up to a new day. Those are gifts from our dear Father. They cost nothing, but mean everything. Most of all, may you know the blessing of Christ’s sacrificial love for you and cherish knowing God is in control!
INSPIRING READS
Stories of faith and resilience on the Midwest prairie & the Civil War Era
Inspirational Historical Romance
~Available on Amazon and Barnes & Noble
**Connect with Cynthia Roemer on Facebook, Goodreads Bookbub and Twitter.
Keeping you and your family in our prayers.
Thanks so much, Barbara! God bless!
Cynthia, you are such an inspiration to me, even in your hard times. Thanks for sharing your soul with us. <3 Continued prayers for you & your family.
Thank you, Peg! I appreciate you reaching out. Praying the Lord will use my story to touch others’ hearts. Have a wonderful Thanksgiving!
Thank you for sharing. My husband and I went through similar circumstances. He was diagnosed with renal cell carcinoma and went through surgery to remove the kidney and football size tumor. The cancer metastasized to several different places starting with the lungs and lymph nodes. Well now we had stage 4 to deal with. He was on cancer chemo pills and different kinds of treatments for almost eleven years straight. One time the doctor said he was in remission during all this and took him off the chemo pills. Then he had to go right back on them. He passed away last year in August. God gave us that extra time and he still enjoyed life for the most part. It’s not over till God says it’s over. I would tell my husband, you are not going home to Jesus till he gets ready for you. So…we are all in the same boat. When God calls our name be it in a car accident or sickness we telling this old world good bye.
I pray that you will stay healthy to enjoy life while you go through this battle. I hope this encourages and not discouraged you.
Thank you so much for sharing your story, Brenda! So sorry for your loss, but I’m thankful your husband had several years to enjoy. You are so right. Only God knows how long we will be on this earth. Making each day count is what we have to do. God bless!
You are so right. Alfred was on a 5 year journey with dementia. He has a new body and a great mind, too now and he is with Jesus.
I look at all the blessings we shared in the 46 years we were married. I praise God for His goodness, mercy and love each day.
I am praying for you.
Thank you for sharing, Linda. A wonderful way to view you and your husband’s journey. God bless you! Have a Happy Thanksgiving!
Happy Thanksgiving. I pray that you will have a wonderful time with your family. You are in my thoughts and prayers. God bless you.
Thank you, Debra! Happy Thanksgiving!
Thank you for sharing your heart. So many people need the encouragement for the tragedies in their lives. You have been a blessing. My prayers will be added to yours.
Thank you, Linda. It’s my prayer the Lord will used my story to encourage and strengthen others. I appreciate your kind words. God bless!
You are such an inspiration to me. I hope that if I am ever in a similar situation, I will be able to accept God’s plan for my life with grace.
I will continue to pray for daily mercies, and reminders of His love.
Thank you, Jenny! I appreciate your kind words and your continued prayers!
I still remember those words that told me I have cancer. It was hard to believe but I knew already in my heart. All else seems so trivial apart from our Heavenly Father when life’s journey takes us captive. While I am now in remission, there is always the possibility of recurrence. I recall asking God what He wanted my family to do with all of this and He so clearly told me that He needed witnesses among the hopeless in our cancer centers. This led to my volunteer work at our primary location and the ability to love on patients in tangible and intangible ways. And it also led to our daughter’s vision of a career path that she had not considered. She began working there in the lab as soon as she graduated from college. She now, after ten years, is making strides in Infection Prevention within the Baptist Health system. God does not waste anything!
I am so thankful for you, your voice through your writing and your testimony of God’s faithfulness. I am praying that God holds you tight through the struggles of bearing such a prognosis and allows you to be able to enjoy the time He gives you now. This is a verse we have put on snacks for the treatment room to comfort our patients with the Word:
“Fear not, for I am with you; Be not dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, Yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.” Isaiah 41:10
Be blessed
Thank you so much, Phyllis, for sharing your journey and how the Lord has used you! What a wonderful testimony. I am praying how He wants me to use this experience in my life as well. Whether through writing or otherwise. Isaiah 41:10 is one that I’ve clung to through all of this. It brings such comfort. Thank you! God bless you for reaching out and for your kind thoughts and prayers. I will pray your cancer stays in remission.